You're So Bland! (based on "You're So Vain" by Carly Simon)

You walked into the bookstore
And then the Slayer dropped a text on your head
Some of us think it was the concussion
Myself, I blame the steroids instead
You clench your jaw when thinking hard
(What has your dentist said?)
And then you make love like you're
passing a kidney
passing a kidney stone

You're so bland
We all wish they'd just move on without you
You're so bland (so bland!)
We really wish they'd move on without you
Don't we!  Don't we! Don't we!

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